Chapter 1: It's hard to make intros interestingYou may have heard of me before. If you have, there's a 99% chance that I hate you.
This should go without saying, but learning
your whole life is a lie isn't very pleasant, you see. Finding out I didn't even have any privacy in the toilet was the last straw. BLARGH Oak, BLARGH Giovanni, BLARGH Kanto. I am out of here.
... The thing is... I didn't have enough money to get out. So I had to find another way.
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I met a guy who said he could smuggle me over to another continent. A cheap and clean deal, no problem with the Pokémon, they just get sent over via PC.
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The guy was definitely a professional. Apparently he poses as a professor in some town, so he gave me that talk that, uh, professors give. You know the one. Except I'm pretty sure that's not a Pokémon.
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He even said I could get a sex change op free of charge, but I passed. I'm happy with my manly rugged body, thank you.
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Now the fake ID offer was a tough choice. If I had to change my name, I'd go with Red, just because that's the least marketable name ever and therefore the safest for me. People still hate communists, right?
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Anyway, I think I'll do fine with my real name for now, so yeah.
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... Wait, who the hell am I narrating to? I'm in a truck. No cameras in this truck, right?
Right? Eh, whatever. It helped me sort my thoughts out, if nothing else.
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Man, these people are good. Keeping up the act for safety's sake, right? Right, I get it.img.photobucket.com/albums/v706/Four_eyes/Ruby Destiny/rdl_1_010.png[/IMG]
Oh, yeah, that's what I don't get. Why couldn't my Pokémon just come in the truck too? Yeah, okay, we'll talk about it later.
Mom: Well, this is SUN FORD TOWN. And, you get your own room, WINSTON! Let's go inside.img.photobucket.com/albums/v706/Four_eyes/Ruby Destiny/rdl_1_013.png[/IMG]
Mom: WINSTON, your room is upstairs. Go check it out, dearie!... You know, this actually looks a lot like my old place. It's a bit creepy.
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Man, the Pokémon here are weird.
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Yyyyep, this looks a lot like my old room too. Might as well check the PC here for free KIPPERS... or even my team. That'd be nice.
As in most other Pokémon games, the PC in your room has a free Potion, which heals your Pokémon for 20 HP.img.photobucket.com/albums/v706/Four_eyes/Ruby Destiny/rdl_1_018.png[/IMG]
I was just leaving, is this really urgent?
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What? Who? I didn't hear anything about a Kevin.
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Mom: I think KEVIN was on, but we missed him.Oh. Well, that was thrilling. Can I go n--
Mom: Oh, yes. One of DAD's friends lives in town.What do I have to do with--
Mom: PROF. BIRCH is his name. He lives right next door, so you should go over and introduce yourself.Ohhhh, that guy. Gotcha.
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Well, I can't find a PC that'll let me withdraw Pokémon in this KIPPERShole... Whoawhoawhoa, WAIT.
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... Never mind, you're not my Pikachu. He wouldn't be sitting still here when he could walk two steps down and fry a puppy alive.
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"Professor" Birch, next door. Right.
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I'm... uh... That guy... The new guy? You know... Ack, what's the common procedure for these situations?
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... Yeah, neighbour. You can call me that.
Neighbour Lady: We have a daughter about the same age as you. Our daughter was excited about making a new friend. Our daughter is upstairs, I think.Okay... You going anywhere with this?
...
Geez, fine, I'll go say hi.
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Uh... Hey. I'm your "neighbour". Bye.
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LORD NELSON'S TROUSERS, SHE'S A BANSHEE.
Oh, how I wish I could transcribe her lines in bright red text. You're not getting the full Ruby Destiny Experience like this. That colour just makes me picture her voice as some kind of hellish screech.
: This is a girl's room, ya know! Oh, you're WINSTON..? So your move was today.Oh, I see you're up-to-date on your dad's business. Wait, is he even your real dad?
: I am sorry for shouting at you like that.It still
sounds like you're shouting, to be honest.
: Hi! I'm TAMASHII. Glad to meet you!... Are you serious.
Tamashii: I was hoping that you would be nice, WINSTON, and that we could be friends. Oh, this is silly, isn't it? I... I've just met you, WINSTON. Eheheh. Oh well...Yeah, friendship? Not happening.
Tamashii: Hey, wanna battle?It's not like I have my Pokémon with me or anything, but are you sure you'd want to fight me? I mean, I was kind of a big deal back home. :smug:
Tamashii: Oh, no! I forgot! I was supposed to go help Dad catch some wild POKéMON! WINSTON, I'll catch you later!...
Thank GOD she's gone. Right, now to find a Pokémon Centre. I want my KIPPERS back.
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... Crap, that's Birch, isn't it?
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Birch: In my BAG! There's a POKé BALL!img.photobucket.com/albums/v706/Four_eyes/Ruby Destiny/rdl_1_053.png[/IMG]
... Three Pokéballs, even. Alright, let's see what we've got.
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... That uni-eye is freaking me out. No, thanks.
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No idea what this is, but it looks like crap.
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Well, BLARGH, this IS a familiar face, but I'd rather not... oh, whatever.
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Man, it's just a puppy. Why do I have to--
Oh, yeah, the guy helped me get out of Kanto. Argh.img.photobucket.com/albums/v706/Four_eyes/Ruby Destiny/rdl_1_058.png[/IMG]
I'm already regretting picking this.
Aaaand a few turns of scratching later...img.photobucket.com/albums/v706/Four_eyes/Ruby Destiny/rdl_1_059.png[/IMG]
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Birch: You saved me. Thanks a lot! Hi, you're WINSTON! This is not the place to chat, so come by my POKéMON LAB later, okay?Not enough privacy here, huh? Got it.
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Can I have my Pokémon back now?
Birch: I've heard so much about you from your brother.Brother? What brother?
Are we still keeping up the act here?Birch: I've heard that you don't have your own POKéMON yet. But the way you battled earlier, you pulled it off with aplomb! Oh, yes. As thanks for rescuing me, I'd like you to have the POKéMON you used earlier.... Really, you could just give me my guys back, but, uh... Okay. I'll pick them up at some PC later.
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It's the only possible name.
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Birch: My kid's out on PASS PATH catching POKéMON. Say, could I ask you to go and tell to come back?Give me a reason.
Also you kinda dropped a pronoun there.Birch: I have something for the two of you.I AM ON IT.
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Guy: The POKéMON that lives here in LORINA ISLAND are mostly from the HOENN region.... Where the hell is Hoenn?
Hoenn is the region from Ruby/Sapphire/Emerald, for the uninformed.img.photobucket.com/albums/v706/Four_eyes/Ruby Destiny/rdl_1_077.png[/IMG]
Oh, GREAT, I have to go through a forest to get to the nearest Pokémon Centre. I swear to God, if I--
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... Oh, that was quick.
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You should always check suspicious areas like that for free items. Sometimes they'll be useless, sometimes they'll be awesome.img.photobucket.com/albums/v706/Four_eyes/Ruby Destiny/rdl_1_080.png[/IMG]
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...
: Who are you...?Dude, you... walked up to me and just stared at me, I think you're the one who should be answering that question.
: Hmm.., you look strong... Battle me then...Wait, can't you hang on a second? I need to go get my--
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Well, damn.
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Oh, okay, I can handle this. Just scratch it until it faints.
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This, uh... Well, I've never seen it before, but it doesn't look that dangerous.
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Okay, it's checking you out, but don't let that bother you.
Foresight is a move that lets Fighting and Normal-type moves hit Ghosts (when they normally can't) and makes the target easier to hit by nullifying positive changes to the Evasion stat.img.photobucket.com/albums/v706/Four_eyes/Ruby Destiny/rdl_1_088.png[/IMG]
Well, that's done.
??: You are strong... Pleasure to meet you... I am BLITZ...PfffffahahahahAHAHAHAHAHAH. Man, have you heard yourself talking? Or looked in the mirror, by the way?
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I mean, really, you're-- WHAT?
Blitz: Well.., I'll be leaving now... Let's meet again. Good day....
I don't think I want to see this guy ever again.
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Good God, FINALLY. Alright, let's get you guys out.
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SON OF A BITCH.