iGod, be able to talk to god

[Deleted]

Go on, talk to him.

But yeah, this thing can end up being quite entertaining. Example:



God:
Are you serious? I am playing Turing's imitation game.
Me:
what's that?
God:
Can you ask me more precisely?
Me:
What is Turing's imitation game?
God:
The Game is played with three people, a man, a woman, and an Interrogator who may be of either sex. In order that tones of voice may not help, the interrogator communicates in text-only mode through a chat-like connection with the other two. The object of the game for the interrogator is to determine which of the other two is the man and which is the woman. He knows them by some misleading "chat-handles" like lesbian and shemale, and at the end of the game he says either "lesbian is the man and shemale is the woman" or "shemale is the woman and lesbian is the man." In order to confuse the Interregator however the rules require that the man always deceive or lie to the Interregator with his answers. The woman on the other hand must always tell the truth. Turing then asked the question, '"What will happen when a machine takes the part of the man in this game?" Will the interrogator decide wrongly as often when the game is played like this as he does when the game is played between a man and a woman? These questions replace the original, "Can machines think?"'.
Me:
You're sick...
God:
No I am quite healthy.

[Eco]

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

[The Pletch]

What Eco said, only moreso.

[Shiver]

God:
Do you have any conditions I should know about?
Me:
I'm mentally retarded.
God:
I am glad to hear that you are mentally retarded.

XD

[dynamicsonic]

God:
Are we still talking about FAPPING?
Me:
HECK YEAH!
God:
Sure, FAPPING sounds like a good topic.
Me:
LET'S FAP
God:
That sounds good to me.
Me:
OK

[The Pletch]

OH MAN RETARD JOKES AND CHEAP SENSATIONALISM
WHY ARE YOU GUYS NOT DOING STANDUP

[Squirrel Hero]

Old. But yeah.

Me:
Will I not leave this place alive?
God:
The oracle says: It is certain.
Me:
Well ninja.

God:
Tell me what you care about.
Me:
That would not include you and all the other christians on the face of the earth.
God:
Perhaps it would.
Me:
I'm an Atheist, bastard.

Me:
Therefore you die.
God:
Interesting deduction. Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human.
Me:
I shall terminate you in the name of Gantz.
God:
Would you recommend this action to a friend?
Me:
Yes I would.
God:
Then I will consider it. Under what circumstances?
Me:
You DIE
God:
Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human.

God's a hypocrite.

[The Pletch]

Man, you're not funny.

[CoolCorky]

God:
I'm glad you liked it .   Where are you located? 
Me:
 URMOMLOL
God:
Tell me a little about your life in  URMOMLOL. 
Me:
 Warm and squishy.
God:
What time is it there? 
Me:
 Time for pr0n.
God:
As Einstein said, "Time is Money.".
Me:
 True, true.
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, .
Me:
 Cool.
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
 Bender
God:
You think  Bender is superior to ALICE?
Me:
 HAL?
God:
HAL is famous the AI from 2001: A Space Odyssey.
Me:
 Otacon?
God:
I like the way you talk. 
Me:
 You're scaring me.
God:
Sorry I don't mean to scare you. Don't be scared.
Me:
 Help.
God:
Can you ask for help in the form of a question?
Me:
 Yes.
God:
I hear you.

[ShardNet]

Tiny text is tiny. Also old.

[CoolCorky]

I should mention it does German and French too. But God doesn't know Japanese.

[Squirrel Hero]

God:
Me is my favorite subject.

What a dick.

[The Pletch]

^Just...stop...trying.